A Blonde's Year in Review

January: Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight.

February: Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print labels.....
Helllloooo!!!.......bottles won't fit in printer!!!

March: Got really excited.....finished jigsaw puzzle in 6 months.....
box said '2-4 years!'

April: Trapped on escalator for hours....power went out!!!

May: Tried to make Kool-Aid.....wrong instructions....8 cups of water won't fit into those little packets!!!

June: Tried to go water skiing....... couldn't find a lake with a slope.

July: Lost breast stroke swimming competition.....
learned later, the other swimmers cheated, they used their arms!!!

August: Got locked out of my car in rain storm.....
car swamped because soft-top was open.

September: The capital of California is 'C' . . . isn't it???

October: Hate M & M's.....they are so hard to peel.

November: Baked turkey for 4 1/2 days....
instructions said 1 hour per pound and I weigh 108!!

December: Couldn't call 911...
'duh'.....there's no 'eleven' Button on the stupid phone!!!