| Benign | What you be after you be eight. |
| Bacteria | Back door to cafeteria. |
| Barium | What you do with dead folks. |
| Cesarean Section | A neighborhood in Rome. |
| Catscan | Searching for the cat. |
| Cauterize | Made eye contact with her. |
| Colic | A sheep dog. |
| Coma | A punctuation mark. |
| D&C | Where Washington is. |
| Dilate | To live longer than your kids do. |
| Enema | Not a friend. |
| Fester | Quicker than someone else. |
| Fibula | A small lie. |
| G.I.Series | World Series of military baseball. |
| Hangnail | What you hang your coat on. |
| Impotent | Distinguished, well known. |
| Labor Pain | Getting hurt at work. |
| Morbid | A higher offer than I bid. |
| Nitrates | Cheaper than day rates. |
| Medical Staff | A Doctor's cane, sometimes shown with a snake. |
| Node | I knew it. |
| Outpatient | A person who has fainted. |
| Pap Smear | A fatherhood test. |
| Pelvis | Second cousin to Elvis. |
| Post Operative | A letter carrier. |
| Recovery Room | Place to do upholstery. |
| Secretion | Hiding something. |
| Tablet | A small table to change babies on. |
| Seizure | Roman emperor who lived in the Ceasarean Section. |
| Terminal Illness | Getting sick at the train station. |
| Tumor | More than one. |
| Urine | Opposite of mine. |
| Varicose | Near by. |
| Hospital | The biggest building in town, other than Joe's feed warehouse or Franks lumber mill. |